Money......
 
  It can buy a House
  But not a Home
 
  It can buy a Bed
  But not Sleep
 
  It can buy a Clock
  But not Time
 
  It can buy you a Book
  But not Knowledge
 
  It can buy you a Position
  But not Respect
 
  It can buy you Medicine
  But not Health
 
  It can buy you Blood
  But not Life
 
  It can buy you Sex
  But not Love
 
  So you see money isn't everything.
  I tell you all this because I am your Friend, and as
  your Friend I want to take away your pain and
  suffering...
  so send me all your money and I will suffer for you.
  A truer Friend than me you will never find.
  CASH ONLY PLEASE.