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One day Little Red Ridinghood set off for her Grandma's house with a basket of sugar cookies. Before she got to the door to leave, her mother stopped her and handed her a large caliber revolver (44 magnun) and told her, "Red (her mom always called her Red), whatever you do watch out for that big bad wolff, you know he's been seen running around our neck of the woods. And Red, remember, the gun that is in your basket is loaded and if you do see that pest just pull it out and blow him away" Well as the story goes, Red (I call her that too) headed out the door and onward toward her grandma's house. Just about the time she got halfway, that pesky wolff jumped out from behind a tree and looked Red straight in the eyes, he said "Hello there Little Red Ridinghood (he didn't know her by the name 'Red' like her friends do) I am the biggest baddest wolf in this here kneck of the woods and I just want you to know right here and now that I am going to take you down on the ground and fuck you. "Red just looked that wolf straight back in the eyes, grabbed that large caliber handgun, pointed it straight between his beady little eyes and pronounced,"No you're not, you mean old wolf, you're gonna eat me like the book says!"
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