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  1. A boy come home from school with his exam results. "What did u get?" asked his father. "My marks are under water," said the boy. "What do u mean 'under water'?" "They are all below 'C' level"
  2. Teacher: "Spell 'WATER',"

    Girl: "HIJKLMNO." Teacher: "That doesn't spell 'WATER'," Girl: "Yes, it does it's all the letters from 'H to O'."

  3. Teacher: "How do u think Shakespeare wrote such master

    pieces?" College student: "With a pencil, maam, either a 2B or not 2B."

  4. "Mum, teacher was asking me today if i have any brothers or sisters

    who will be coming to school." "That's nice of her to take such an interest, dear. What did she say when u told her u are the only child?" She just said, "Thank goodness!"

  5. Teacher: "Where were u born?"

    Student: "Singapore, Sir." Teacher: "Which part?" Student: "All of me, Sir."

  6. Teacher: "Chong, u missed school last Friday."

    Chong: "You're wrong, Sir." Teacher: "Wrong, how is that?" Chong: "I was absent, yes but I certainly didn't miss it!"

  7. A school girl was having an eye test.

    "Can u read out the letters on the chart on the wall?" asked the optician. "What chart?" asked the girl.

  8. A teacher was asking her class:

    "What is the difference between 'unlawful' and 'illegal'?" Only one hand shot up. "Ok, answer, Joan," said the teacher. "'unlawful' is when u do something the law doesn't allow and 'illegal' is a sick eagle."





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